You are incredibly busy. Every day. Absent team members are really inconvenient for you.
Always, actually.
Because you still want to achieve those team goals and help your organisation thrive. Without putting too much pressure on your team. How can you, as a manager, prevent burnouts? Or significantly reduce them in any case? So that team members don't collapse but are able to continue working for you. You can do a great deal, but this does require a new approach. Because you, in your position as manager or administrator, have enormous influence over this situation.
You are well aware of what burnouts cost your team: money, extra time spent on transfers and reduced job satisfaction, team spirit and team results.
“Burn-out is a massive energy drain in your team and organisation”
Everybody has their limits. Without exception. That's what makes us human, not robots. Two of the nine characteristics of awareness in my new book ‘Personally Inspiring Leadership,’ are: embracing the polarities (including exertion versus relaxation) and respecting natural cycles. If you follow these natural laws as a leader you will keep your team or organisation dynamic and durable.
In your role as manager, do you accept, listen and act appropriately for what you ask from your team members? That they must achieve targets and carry out (extra) tasks. But is this how you treat their vulnerabilities as people? Even if that is less beneficial for your bottom line? In short, do you embrace both the strengths and vulnerabilities of your team?
In concrete terms do you recognise the signs of physical and mental stress in your staff? Do you know what they are? Or do you keep distance and pay them scant attention? See what happens if you approach them more often or telephone to ask them how they really feel, making sure that you break through the barrier of social acceptability. Then you might be in time to head off burnouts.
If your team members are then honest enough to say that it is actually too much for them, acknowledge their negative stress? Because it is all too easy to minimise or justify the stress signals sent by your colleagues and fail to take action. Why? Because it might be inconvenient for you.
After rain comes sunshine, comes rain, comes sunshine, comes rain, etc. After inhalation comes exhalation, comes inhalation, comes exhalation, etc. After exertion comes relaxation, comes exertion, comes relaxation, etc
These natural cycles typify natural life itself and keep us energetic and durable. And this also applies to your team or organisation. There is just one thing that can completely work against this and cause systematic negative stress in you or your team: ego fed by fear. Experience reveals that three ego passengers in people totally ignore natural laws: your inner pleaser, pusher and perfectionist. They may encourage us to go on for longer and worker harder than our body can handle, until the lights go out. Because those who don't want to hear must feel. A terrible pity.
If you don't allow your ego as a leader to constantly dominate you and your team members you will open the door to team vitality and durability. If you respect necessary relaxation and vulnerability your leadership will be so much more effective in the long run.
Would you like to know how to recognise and acknowledge stress signals from your team members and how to deal with them effectively? Would you like to learn practical ways to strengthen team spirit as a buffer to stress?
On 12 January from 4 AM to 4 AM, I will be holding a Webinar for administrators, school heads and internal facilitators in cooperation with Leeruniek: Team vitality and durability.
Yes, please contact me [email protected]. or call/app me on: +31-6-15620111
In a free orientation we can look how I can be at your service.
Take a look at this Christmas present: the book ‘Personally Inspiring Leadership.’ For more effective work, a meaningful life and a better world. View or order a copy here:
(English book will appear in the beginning of 2023). Click on Fragment to see the promotional copy and find out whether my book could help you.
Or experience in person how you can improve your work/life balance with the new Personally Inspiring Leadership Master's Course:
©2022: Martin Thoolen
#persoonlijkinspirerendleiderschap #persoonlijkleiderschap #inspirerendleiderschap #mastercoursepersoonlijkinspirerendleiderschap #coaching #training #egomanagement #ego #stress #stressmanagement #werkdruk #burnout #vitaliteit
Working in The Netherlands as an expat? Or as a Dutch expat abroad?
Can you use some support as an international professional to find your way? Maybe Expat Coaching is just for you! Check here.
Matthijs van Nieuwkerk, Glennis Grace, Marco Borsato en met hen vele andere (beroemde) mensen; vroeg of laat slaan ze door en komt de totale waarheid aan het licht. Wat is er eigenlijk aan de hand? En hoe lossen we het op?
It all revolves around their ego, which clamps itself determinedly to a few ego passengers, focusing on projecting a positive image. But there is no real awareness that this is happening.
One of the three fundamental forces that determine all our choices and behaviour is our ego, as I explain in my new book - Personal Inspiring Leadership. It highlights several points, including the fact that your ego is nothing more than the 'I' that you identify with and think 'this is how I am'. You are frequently controlled subconsciously by a number of ego passengers. You can see your ego as a bus on which each passenger thinks, feels, sees, talks and acts differently. You behave very differently when your inner pleaser pleaser drives the bus instead of, for example, your instinctive, animal ego passenger.
In people who demand a positive public image of themselves you often see the following ego passengers hijacking thoughts and actions: the pleaser, controller, perfectionist, pusher or patriarch The less socially desirable ego passengers are subconsciously left on the back seat or even moved to the trailer of oblivion, starting their own demonic lives in the darkness.
However, everything that you hide in yourself will boomerang back on you eventually. See what happens when you systematically push away your instinctive passenger, just like trying to push a ball ever further underwater. Despite your best efforts the instinctive passenger will resurface with hellish rage, unbridled sexual desire or unacceptable behaviour and insults directed towards others. And all this happened to Kanye West, Prince Andrew, Bill Cosby and so many other celebrities.
“Everything that you hide in yourself will boomerang back on you eventually”
We are living in a time of great spiritual transition in which the truth is gradually being unveiled. That which could remain concealed is coming to light sooner and more often. This provides a more complete picture of what is really happening. It is preceded by intense polarisation, but growing transparency helps us see the truth. How do we resolve this polarisation? Simply by setting good examples, at home and at work.
Prevent polarisation and employ ego management - recognise and acknowledge your light and dark sides and handle them more effectively. This requires courage and relentless honesty about all aspects of yourself. For example, do not suppress your instinctive ego passengers, but rather acknowledge, embrace and communicate them. Prevent the accumulation of an emotional dam full of anger or unfulfilled sexual desires. Because when your inner controller runs out of energy and the dam breaks you will be inundated.
Check the new Master’s Course – Spirited Personal Leadership - here:
https://martinthoolen.com/en/service/master-module-persoonlijk-inspirerend-leiderschap/
Or enrich yourself with the insights and knowledge that help you in my new (Dutch) book: https://www.amazon.com/Spirited-Personal-Leadership-effective-meaningful/dp/9090368027/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1T35YC0885VAQ&keywords=spirited+personal+leadership&qid=1689054493&sprefix=spirited+personal+leadershipaps225&sr=8-1
(English book will appear in the beginning of 2023) Click on Fragment to see the promotional copy and find out whether my book could help you.
©2022: Martin Thoolen
#personalleadership #inspiredleadership #spiritedpersonalleadership #mastercoursespritedpersonalleadership #coaching #training
For professionals, managers, leaders and administrators with HBO or academic work and thinking level.
Th.fr. 30/31 March; 11/12 May; 15/16 June 2023
Request a free intake. Look here or download the brochure here: https://martinthoolen.com/en/service/master-module-persoonlijk-inspirerend-leiderschap/
Go to: https://bit.ly/3V7uO2O Click on 'Fragment' beneath the cover and have a look at the promo copy
#persoonlijkinspirerendleiderschap #persoonlijkleiderschap #inspirerendleiderscha #coaching #training #trainingcourses #mastercoursepersoonlijkinspirerendleiderschap #duurzameinzetbaarheid #stressmanagement #zelfmanagement #personalempowerment #burnout
for effective work, meaningful living and a better world
From now on the Dutch hardcopy is deliverable. The English version will appear at the beginnign of 2023. https://bit.ly/3V7uO2O
Want to take a look at the Dutch hardcopy?
Click on 'Fragment' beneath the cover and have a look at the promo copy
After three years of work, over 300 pages of new inspiration has finally landed. For your work and private life. If you find it interesting and start reading, I'm curious what you think of it.
Oh yes, do you like to give this inspiration to a family member, friend or colleague?
It would be nice if you share this post.
Kind regards and above all enjoy reading, Martin
P.S. How the world has become is close to my heart. In small and large. That is why I have spent the past 3 years browsing and writing how we can make it more beautiful for ourselves and each other, at work and beyond. This is the result.
This book is intended for anyone who, in their private or work life, wants to:
– effectiever wil werken
– zijn/haar talenten verder wil ontwikkelen
– een gezonde werk/leven-balans wenst
– regie over je eigen leven en werk wil vergroten
– meer plezier, passie, zingeving en vitaliteit wil beleven
– meer innerlijke rust en vrede wil voelen
– wil bijdragen aan betere relaties, zowel zakelijk, als privé
– een zinvolle bijdrage wil leveren aan een betere wereld.
Regardless of whether you are a leader, lawmaker, entrepreneur, manager, professional, associate, student, parent, family member, teenager or an adult.
This book will take you straight to the source of all your choices and behaviors. It will give you accessible insights, inspiring examples and exercises that you’ll be able to apply immediately, and see results of quickly. You will gain insight into the three forces that determine each and every one of your choices, behaviors and personal leadership: ego, soul and consciousness (spirit).
The following questions will be answered: What is ego anyway? Should you jettison your ego? What are the benefits of ego, and what are its pitfalls? Or, what is the soul? Is there a reason for our existence? What are the five existential tasks the soul has to tackle? What are the pros and cons of working and living from inspiration? And, what is spirit or consciousness? How can you utilize it more to have smoother relationships in private and at work and to create more peace for yourself and others around you? In the last section of the book you will see how you can make a real contribution towards a better world.
It seems unlikely when you look around today. Actually, not just today, but any time in the last five millennia. However, I am still a dreamer who believes it certainly is possible, which gives life meaning.
Especially if we don’t wait for others but take independent action. Not waiting for a redeemer but becoming our own redeemer. Everyone in their own world. With neighbours, colleagues, other road users, fellow citizens and fellow human beings.
A worldwide divergence is currently taking place. One that is inevitable and necessary. Two environments are being created. By those who choose ego, and those who choose (self)consciousness/spirit. These are two incompatible paths that were predicted long ago and are clearly illustrated on the Hopi stone that I visited with a guide in Arizona, the USA, in 2018.
Ego-focused environments, societies and organisations are typified by preferential treatment of some groups at the expense of others. Rich over poor, men above women, white above non-white, non-native above native, etc.
Countries can even be in the grip of an extreme collective ego guided by their ego-driven leaders. They are typified by one of the eight ego-coup roles into which you can fall and remain one of which is the ruler, as I discuss in my book on Spirited Personal Leadership.
In this case, a leader cares for his people, according to a ‘personal diktat.’ He does whatever it takes to be on top, because then he will have more power and influence. They put themselves above others, who must obey their will in order to meet their needs. To achieve this, they use a wide range of power resources, not just the aforementioned position of power. But strong powers of persuasion (which is sometimes expressed as literally screaming at ‘your people’), charisma, strategic traits (including lying) expertise or knowledge, income or status or networks can also be employed to impose their will on others.
If the people ‘under them’ are not obedient, they condemn them and try to get rid of them. The driving force is the fear that they, or their group, will be inadequate or enjoy less prestige. They consistently communicate this fear by means of threats issued to those who think differently. By intimidation. For instance, when the chairman of the board gives you hell, while it is not you but several incumbent administrators who are incompetent. Or threatening using displays of power – from threats of dismissal to military parades with nuclear missiles.
You make your allies dependent by giving preferential treatment and other privileges. For example, in the Corona policy that was enforced by a great many countries all over the world we saw preferred groups, and others who were free to kick the bucket. Vaccines first went to the rich, and then the poor.
Als het ego van een leider over regering nog meer wilt overheersen, breid je je territorium aan eigen bevoegdheden uit en laat ze – als het even kan – vastleggen in statutaire bepalingen, soms tot aan de grondwet toe. Daardoor trek je nog meer macht naar je toe. Kijk maar naar sommigen van onze huidige dictatoriale regeringsleiders. En daar blijft het niet bij, want liefst breiden ze letterlijk hun territorium uit en beroven andere volkeren van hun land. Om zichzelf en hun voorkeursgroep te bedienen. Ten koste van anderen.
Deze meer spiritueel laag-ontwikkelde samenlevingen, regeringen en organisaties maken zich, ondanks of soms dankzij de invulling van hun religie, schuldig aan angst zaaien, macht uitoefenen, manipulatie, martelingen, (uit)moorden, stelselmatige indoctrinatie, verbergen en verdraaien van informatie of het geven van eenzijdige informatie.
But things can be different if ‘Inspired Leaders’ rule the world.
De spiritueel meer ontwikkelde samenlevingen worden gekenmerkt onder andere een oprechte en goedwerkende democratie waar daadwerkelijk geluisterd wordt naar álle stemmen. Waar geen geheimen leven en verborgen agenda’s zijn, maar volledige transparantie is. Waar gelijke rechten gelden voor iedereen, zoals gelijke beloningen voor vrouwen en mannen. Waar alle groepen en landen in vrede naast elkaar en met elkaar leven en werken. Waar genoeg water, eten en huisvesting voor iedereen is en honger verbannen is. Waar de voedingsbodem van ons bestaan, de aarde, in ons doen en laten gerespecteerd wordt. Een utopie?
Current development of the world In any case, right now the world is suffering a collective ego regression led by ego or ego-disturbed leaders who feed low ego societies. Current economic and political interests prevail above human dignity and equality. Even the United Nations, which should promote a peaceful world and care for everyone, displays a number of fundamental shortcomings. Injustice has even been given a seat at the UN. Just look at the UN human rights council, which refused to debate on the report on human rights violations in China. A report that had previously been concealed despite the proven use of systematic torture, detention and brainwashing amongst the Muslim Uyghur minority.
Every country that voted no or abstained contributes to this universal injustice. They lack the guts to choose universal justice. And this is simply due to the fear of sacrificing too much political, economic and personal capital, status and privilege. Consequently, fear and power are the dominant factors, not love of your fellow human beings. Qatar’s no vote, based on economic interests, clearly highlighted its own human rights abuses. But ok, football entertainment trumps everything. And we’ll soon all be enjoying watching the World Cup. For the record, I am a massive football fan, but this just isn’t right.
And injustice is ubiquitous. In my own country too. No different to other countries. The leadership in recent years has allowed the rich (mostly men) to get richer and the poor to get poorer, so now even food banks can no longer cope, on top of the immense growth of policy implemented on the basis of lies and egoism.
And as I already mentioned, some governments and leaders deliberately utilise control to impose a regime where torture, systematic murder and indoctrination are portrayed as normal and responsible. Sometimes even in the name of God, Allah or whoever. Because this gives you licence to do whatever you want. But what if your own child, father or mother is the one having their human rights contravened? What if the situation is reversed and you or your partner or relative are indoctrinated, tortured or killed? Tell me, what is the difference? A great deal from the ego, and nothing from the spirit. Because then we are all equal. All people with the same wishes, fears, pains and desires. There is no difference because at our core we are all equal.
“At our core we are all equal”
What injustice have you experienced? How did it feel? What if you were also let down by your own government or the UN? Or even tortured or killed? This is not how we’ll make a better world.
Fortunately, there is also a natural development underway. New generations are increasingly intolerant of these unjust ego societies. Look at Iran. Patience is running thin with the reign of terror imposed by patriarchal white-man-power (fed by a distorted use of religion). It is just a matter of time. The fresh spirit-awareness of younger generations no longer accepts it, and the revolt is growing of its own accord. Simply because people’s hearts can no longer bear it.
It is also time for beloved leaders to cultivate a better world, as you can read in another article: https://martinthoolen.com/en/openstaande-vacatures-voor-de-wereldde-geliefde-leider/
Besides new leaders and the natural development of ego resistance, you can also make a personal contribution to a better world. You don’t have to wait for others. Dare to choose. Dare to be a dissident in your ego environments. Choose for or create a better world around you, however hard it may be. Are you aware of your own ego, soul and how (self)consciousness/spirit can enrich you? See yourself with new eyes and approach everyone around you in a truthful, sincere and peaceful way, even when you do not agree. Look at how you treat your family, neighbours, customers, team-members, board-members, shareholders, employees at work yourself. Thus creating a better world around you daily. https://www.amazon.com/Spirited-Personal-Leadership-effective-meaningful/dp/9090368027/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1T35YC0885VAQ&keywords=spirited+personal+leadership&qid=1689054493&sprefix=spirited+personal+leadershipaps225&sr=8-1
Or would you like to personally receive and experience the tools for a better world? Then this Master’s course could help: https://martinthoolen.com/en/service/master-module-persoonlijk-inspirerend-leiderschap/Furthermore, it can also fundamentally promote a more effective, balanced, sustainable and dynamic working life and add meaning to your personal life.
A better world. Is that possible? Yes! If this all happens more there really could be a burgeoning paradise on earth in just a few decades. You can go for that instead of complaining and feeling victimised by a world you can’t stand.
The choice is yours.
© 2022: Martin Thoolen #personalleadership #inspiredleadership #spiritedpersonalleadership #mastercoursespritedp[ersonalleadership #peace #peaceonearth #coaching #training #personalleadership #inspiredleadership #personalleadership #spiritedpersonalleadership #mastercoursespiritedpersonalleadership #coaching #training #egomanagement #ego #soulwork #mastercoursepersoonlijkinspirerendleiderschap #coaching #training #vrede #vredeopaarde
© 2022: Martin Thoolen
Negative work pressure is relieved if you use time and stress management, which are handy behavioural skills. However, apparently they may still be far from sufficient. Why? Because you have not tackled the root cause.
That is what I have noticed in hundreds of clients who I helped to gain vitality and lasting employability over the last 30 years.
Want voorbij gedrag, zijn er diepere krachten die je gedrag aansturen, waaronder je ego en je ziel, zoals je terugziet in mijn boek: ‘Persoonlijk Inspirerend Leiderschap’.
Most people suffering excessive stress or burn outs often carry a potent combination of three ego passengers in their personality. Passengers that they have worked with for years (frequently being insufficiently aware of them): the pleaser, pusher and perfectionist. If you don’t rebalance these core elements, negative stress can easily return.
If you penetrate to an even deeper level, beyond your personality, inspiration also plays a fundamental role. Because:
‘Every relationship or system that offers insufficient space for the existence and unique expression of the soul imprisons the soul and can cause serious physical illness’.
Work environments can sometimes be healthy for your soul but may also become toxic. (geworden).
‘Soms is het laf voor je ziel om te gaan, maar soms laf om te blijven’.
In short, if you want to tackle this issue at the source you can request an interactive workshop for you and your colleagues. I have a wealth of experience in this field, including organising workshops for attorney generals, the Public Prosecutor’s Office and other organisations. Ask for an intake interview and send an e-mail to: [email protected]..
Whether you want to help yourself or a member of staff to relieve the negative pressure, take a look at what an individual coaching session can do for you. See: https://martinthoolen.com/en/service/coaching-vitaliteit-duurzame-inzetbaarheid/
©2022: Martin Thoolen
#Stress #Stressmanagement #timemanagement #personalleadership #vitality # mentalheath #coaching #training #duurzameinzetbaarheid #werkdruk #stress#stressmanagement #timemanagement
How miracles come (back again) into your work an life? By opening yourself up to synchronicity and interconnection. Because everything is connected to everything. This is one of the nine attributes of spirit (consciousness) that you will find in my English book ‘Spirited Personal Leadership’ that ia released on December 1, 2022.
Alongside practical cases, insights, and exercises about how these cosmic winks can help you with your work, I also share an occasional personal story. This is one of them, it’s almost unbelievable but it’s true.
It was an unforgettable summer. In 2005 I was traveling in British Columbia, Canada. It was my heart’s desire to be part of a sweat lodge ceremony with only real ‘natives’, and to connect with Leonard George, the son of legendary chief Dan George. What was to happen later exceeded all my expectations. I ended up in a stream of wonderment with a lot of synchronicity, that literally showed me that everything is connected to everything.
In the tourist office in downtown Vancouver I told an associate about my work and my heart‘s desire. After a while she said ‘I never do this but I happen to know someone who can help you get Leonard George’s phone number.’ I walked out the door totally ‘uplifted.’ I made the call and Leonard’s phone number was given to me. However, it didn’t feel like the right time to call Leonard until two weeks later when something special happened.
After literally seeing more bears on the road than people I wound up in the coastal town of Tofino on Vancouver Island. I was spontaneously attracted to a building that had a large eagle painted on the side of it. I’ve always been attracted to eagles and hawks. When I was 14 years old I created my signature featuring a sun and two eagles, which I use to this day. Years later I found out that according to Mayan astrology I was born on the day of Double Eagle (tone 11)!
When I went inside, I naturally walked over to an old canoe and held the edge of it with my hand. Without thinking about it, suddenly a wave of emotions came over me. The only thing I could think was: ‘I’ve been in one of these things before.’ The feel of the wood, the scent, what it looked like, I just knew it. I was so deeply touched that I wanted to know whose building this was and who had created all this art. It was Sir Roy Henry Vickers, a chief of the Eagle clan.
A new desire was born: I wanted to meet him. Except, he wasn’t there but somewhere on the mainland and nobody knew exactly where to find him. After I went back outside, I sat for a while overlooking the bay and I decided now it was time to call Leonard George.
Lo and behold, I got a hold of him. We talked for about 20 minutes and I indicated that I’d like to meet Roy Vickers and participate in a sweat lodge. In response he told me: ‘Just follow the spirits.’ Two weeks later it seemed like the impossible was about to happen.
After driving for about three hours from St. Rupert eastward into the mainland, we suddenly saw a black bear cross the road, going to the left. At that moment I remembered the words ‘follow the spirits’ and I decided to make a left turn, deviating from the original plan. After about an hour I came to a small village called Hazelton. Looking for ‘natives’ I ended up in a large bingo hall where I inquired about a sweat lodge. I was referred to band member Mike who was the day-to-day manager of the reservation. He was reserved at first, until I told him I had spoken with Leonard George. The next day a sweat lodge was organized.
Mike led us to the sweat lodge, set up a few yards away from the salmon-rich and roiling Skeena river. Mike turned out to be a member of the Eagle clan, just like Roy Vickers. I had just met another pair of figurative Eagles! Just before the ceremony started two actual Eagles flew past the entrance above the river! But that wasn’t everything.
After round two I heard a quad arriving and being parked in front of the sweat lodge. Mike invited the new arrival to be in charge of the ceremony, and the man sat right next to me near the entrance. It was Roy Vickers! Of all places! How was this possible? How could it be that in all of Canada I happened to be sitting next to Roy, whom I’d been looking for, while I didn’t even know where he was?!
My heart’s desire to meet Leonard George, to participate in a genuine sweat lodge and meet Roy Vickers had all come to pass. ‘Just follow the spirits.’
When I returned to Holland, I looked up what day the sweat lodge had been according to Mayan astrology: It had been my birthday of the Double Eagle (tone 11)! How was this even possible? For me this was really a sign that coincidences aren’t just coincidences. And that on a spirit level we are always connected. Roy beautifully and powerfully put this into words in a message to me: ‘Friends in spirit.’
More information about Roy you’ll find on: www.royhenryvickers.com
© 2022: Martin Thoolen
From the cradle to the grave, every soul is faced with five tasks that promote living and working with happiness, meaning and enthusiasm.
This is what I share in my upcoming E-book 'Spirited Personal Leadership', which will be published on 1st of December 2022. Here is a hint of what to expect.
The five tasks facing the soul can be derived from the following:
1. Lack of intense feeling and learning from felt experiences
2. Lack of sovereignty.
3. Cultivating soul pain or letting it exist.
4. Lack of soul joy.
5. No development of talent or realisation of dreams.
When people lose contact with their soul this is usually because they live and work from the head and rationality, but without their heart and soul. All kinds of constructed concepts relating to life and work, such as thoughts, convictions and personal ideologies seem to strengthen their grip on their lives. Why?
Because people often subconsciously choose identification with their rational side and only have (illusory) control over the certain and uncertain. They only want comfort and happiness in life and reject the painful, vulnerable or uncertain aspects. And they want to keep control, trying to make this ostensible success formula work. Then certain ego passengers, such as the rational side and the controller take the upper hand. Your ego has taken the reins, often without you being aware that this has happened.
In recent years, a multitude of books have been written on happiness and how to achieve it. However, you don’t actually need to search for a path to it, because it is already there – if your life is based on spirit or awareness. And that path has always been there. Moreover, we see that fortune-hunters set goals and have expectations for the future that are oftentimes unachieved. It is then just a question of time until something goes wrong and they suffer bad luck or accidents.
As the natural cycles of spirit show us, happiness is always followed by unhappiness. Sunshine is followed by rain, followed by sunshine, followed by rain, followed by sunshine, etc. Incessantly. Furthermore, fortune-hunters want to ‘have happiness.’ And that last word, ‘have,’ is the crux of the matter. This when the greedy child of your ego hijacks your subconscious. It temporarily satiates your desire but does not fulfil it in the long term.
For example, bucket list hunters think that they will be happier by ticking their desire boxes. But when the need has been met (which there is nothing wrong with and briefly makes you feel happy and ‘alive’) you simply return to everyday reality.
This is a case of excessive ego because the inner greedy child starts covertly manipulating you. And when your expected happiness fails to materialise, you feel unhappy. You can bet your life that this happiness house of cards will collapse eventually.
“Sooner or later, fortune-hunters become unhappy.”
The question is how do you handle both happiness and unhappiness in a healthy way? If you only embrace and chase happiness, sooner or later unhappiness will return to you like a cosmic boomerang. The cosmos will then automatically involve you in (unforeseen) situations, bad luck or unhappiness that you will have to deal with and will learn from as a soul. Maybe to wake you up from the ‘illusion of happiness’ that you had led yourself and others to believe.
In short, it is precisely clinging to and chasing your rational concepts and goals, such as happiness, which prevent you from accessing that deeper layer of feeling where your soul speaks that gives you a deeper feeling of peace. Because the gateway to your soul is your heart, not your rationality. Finally, heart and soul are mentioned in one breath for good reason.
“The gateway to your soul is your heart.”
When you actually feel your heart skipping a beat, quaking, bleeding, crying, glowing and shining you are in direct contact with your soul. Euphoric successes and ecstatic, painful and vulnerable experiences will then be a greater part of your being. The fact that you permit yourself to feel the felt experiences and don’t skim over the surface will bring you closer to deepening, truthfulness and individuality.
And then you can be happy with everything that comes and goes. Genuinely happy.
And there is so much more that can enrich your work and life. Check publications on: https://martinthoolen.com/en/inspiratie/
If this looks interesting, send me an e-mail at: [email protected]. and I will tell you how to order as soon as the book is published.
And if you want to experience it, develop and contribute even more to a better world in your own way, this might help you: https://martinthoolen.com/en/service/master-module-persoonlijk-inspirerend-leiderschap/
© 2022: Martin Thoolen
After two years of writing a new book and Masterclass for Leaders, I am coming into new focus. Also with this revamped website. Here you can quickly find the new services you are looking for to move you, your team or organization forward.
Maar ook tref je hier snel zaken aan die jouw persoonlijk, professioneel of team-functioneren inspireren. Zoals korte video’s van inspiratoren, interessante web-links, boekentips, maar ook eigen blogs, artikelen en boek-publicaties.
I wish you a lot of inspiration.
Martin Thoolen